Joy Over Perfection: Building Health Habits That Last

Writing about goal setting in the new year feels a little disingenuous. While I feel the pull to improve aspects of my life (along with the relentless messaging that I definitely need to!), this feels more like a time to tie up loose ends, to rest and reflect before spring arrives.

That’s the time of year I feel most energized and ready to embrace growth and change.

But we can’t ignore that collective sense of a clean slate as we turn the page on a brand-new shiny year. The possibilities are endless, and we can imagine ourselves 365 days from now, basking in our successes and celebrating the work and dedication it took to get there.

And then it’s the middle of March and we’re all still the same people we were three months ago. We’re not fitter, or drinking less, or training for that 10K, or whatever dream we had.

The trouble is, when we make our resolutions or set our goals from the perspective of things that we should do or want, we’re already setting ourselves up for a fall. Your inner rebel knows that those goals aren’t coming from your heart and will steadfastly crush your efforts.

“Should” goals come directly from the playbooks of patriarchal, capitalist, white supremacy culture. Telling you that you should be more productive or wealthy. Telling you that we should be ashamed of our bodies, our age, and whatever other ways it decides we’re not measuring up. Those goals centre the cult of individualism, taking us further away from a place of shared humanity and community care.

And when it comes to fitness and health, the shame and punishment get dialled up to 11 on the first of January. I hate that so many people are misled by the false promises of the diet industry and take on fitness challenges that are too much, too soon. My life’s work is fighting this garbage—while still sharing the amazing benefits that exercise and simple lifestyle changes can deliver!

Rather than tread the well-worn road of motivational tips and the various methods you can use to create positive change, I invite you to think about are where those goals are coming from, and how to set ones that feel truly good for you. Here are some questions you can contemplate when you’re setting a health or fitness goal for yourself:

• Are you thinking in all-or-nothing terms? Remember that success and failure are bullshit binaries. Everything exists on a spectrum and it’s absolutely transformative to begin moving 5 or 10% in the direction of where you want to be. Resist the narrative to “optimize” everything!

  
  

• How does contemplating or talking about the thing you want make you feel? How much of a priority is this for you? (If it’s not a big priority right now—that’s also okay!)

  
  

• How would you feel as a result of incorporating this change? What would that look like? What might change? Remember, you’re doing this for you, so there are no wrong answers!

  
  

• How might you approach that shift in direction in a way that feels positive and exciting rather than dreary or punitive? Do you have any experiences where you have successfully adopted a healthy new habit that really worked for you?

  
  

• What’s the plan? For example, “eating a protein-rich breakfast three days a week” is a great goal—specific, measurable and tied to an outcome you know will give you more energy. But if you currently don’t eat breakfast at all, or your mornings are filled with the demands of work and/or children, is it realistic? Every good plan has a backup plan—and that plan has a backup plan! Maybe it means you start with one morning a week, or you keep a stash of pre-made breakfast options for those busy days.

  
  

• What about your new habit or change feels good right now? I’m a firm believer in finding the pleasure in things, not just the relief in having done them. What about a breathwork practice feels GOOD? What do you love about moving your body or going to bed early? Do you love the smell of baking your own wholesome snacks? Perhaps you’d love gamifying these practices with an app. If absolutely nothing pleases you about it, it might be an invitation to rethink the plan.

  
  

Whether you love the new year or couldn’t give a rat’s behind, I hope you find many opportunities for joy and pleasure in 2025! And if you ever need advice or guidance with this stuff, we’re always here for you.

-Jenn